Pleasure Possibilities Part 3

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Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer, cancer and romance, breast cancer and love, sexuality and intimacy after breast cancer

Continuing with pearls of pleasure, today’s pearl for opening to more pleasure and love involves a late night love adventure. It’s worth missing a few of those 40 winks for this special surprise…

Wake him up. Nudge her from the shelter of sleep. Pull them gently from bed, outside, to where the moon hangs low to the ground. Take them out where the air is cold and crisp, bundled in warm clothing. “Why?” he says, tugging on a sweater and shoes. “What are we doing?” she asks as you pull the door shut behind her.

“To see the sky,” is the answer. Walk to the backyard or get in the car and drive for as long as it takes. Go where there’s not much artificial light. In the night, when it is quiet and so dark, and the stars fill the sky with their endless abundance. And the moonlight casts shadows beneath its light.

This. This is the present moment. To be here, to see this, to share these moments. Look at the stars, too many to count. Warp your arms around your sweetheart and let the enormity of the universe fill you with love, pleasure and possibility. Give the enormity of your love. Abandon sleep and know that the night sky is given as gift and grace to you both.

Let the endlessness of the sky, moon and stars remind you of mystery and miracles. Love is a miracle and it can come at any moment. All we need to do is open to it because it’s all around us and in us all the time. Let the sky help you to remember. Let it help you remember to be in your body and to delight in the experiences of all your senses as you take it all in ~

  • Feel the cold air on your cheeks and eyelids
  • Hear the night sounds ~ the birds, the breeze, perhaps some animals
  • Open your mouth and taste the air and notice how it feels on your lips and tongue
  • See how the world looks in the dark of the night as you stand with your beloved
  • Notice any scents ~ are there pine trees nearby, or a hint of salt in the air by the ocean?
  • If you’re out in the snow, make a snow angel, or a sand angel if you’re at the beach!

What does the love and pleasure feel like on this night? What memories will you keep to remind you of this adventure? How will you keep your heart and spirit open to love and pleasure?

Think of more ways that you can surprise your sweetheart with love adventures, and take the adventures!

© 2014 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.

For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

Pleasure Possibilities Part 2

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love letters and cancer, pleasure after cancer, Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer, love notes and cancer

Continuing with pearls of pleasure, today’s pearl for opening to more pleasure and love is about writing love notes and letters ~ to yourself or to your beloved. The intention is to use written words to express your love and pleasure in ways that are surprising and that bring delight.

Here are some ideas to inspire you~

  • Using a pad of blank post-it notes, write a message on each that gives a love or pleasure message. You might write, “When I open my eyes and see you in the morning, my heart overflows with love,” “Feeling the touch of your skin on mine makes me purr,” “You are an angel, a messenger of love.” Let the love and pleasure pour out into the words as you write them. Then put the notes on the car windshield, the bathroom mirror, on the computer monitor, places where they will be seen and will bring the experience of love and pleasure as they are read. You can do this for yourself as well as for your partner. Leave them up so that you or they will see them often.
  • Get a large poster board and write a love note on it with colored markers in large letters. Then tape it to the wall outside the coffee shop where your sweetheart goes on their way to work.
  • Make a lunch for yourself or your sweetheart and put a note in it that describes how much you love them.
  • Write on the mirror with lipstick, “I love you!”
  • If you live in snow or sand country, write a love message in the snow or sand and walk by with your honey. If they don’t see the words, point them out so that they know the message is for them.
  • Send a love or pleasure text to tell them that you can’t wait to see them after work or school.
  • Plan a special meal and put a love note on their plate so that they will see it when they sit at the table.
  • Make a card and put it on their pillow with a piece of chocolate ~ this is finer turn-down service than any hotel!
  • For their birthday, make a card and write the number of ways they bring you pleasure, one for each year of their age. Fifty years old means 50 ways they bring you pleasure. Or turn it the other way and write 50 ways you want to bring them pleasure or love. Or do both.
  • Write a love letter where you let the depth of your love flow freely. Be generous and let them know how precious and special they are to you. If it helps, remember what it was like when you were newly in love. Taking yourself back to that time and place helps to re-create it in the present moment.

Let your heart and imagination soar as you tap into the love and pleasure vibrations. Choose to love, and to love freely and generously. It feels wonderful!

© 2014 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

Pleasure Possibilities

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Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer, cancer and pleasure, love mandala, creating pleasure and love after cancer

At the end of 2013 I suggested that you review the year and look forward, all with the intention of creating your Personal Pleasure Plan for the New Year. In the spirit of pleasure and ideas to inspire and create pleasure, the month of January is devoted to offering you some possibilities for pleasure. Imagine that I am extending my open hand to you and in the palm of my hand are pearls of pleasure. As you examine the pearls, play with those that appeal to you. They are all ways to love yourself and your partner more. As you play with the pearls and discover more pleasure, you are creating a beautiful string of pleasure pearls…

There are so many ways to love and experience pleasure. They all begin with the heart, mind and senses. Open your heart and mind to the idea of creating and experiencing more pleasure in more ways. Today is about visual pleasure and love.

Create a love mandala. In the Hindu and Buddhist traditions, mandalas are geometric shapes that represent the universe. The idea is to use your eyes, hands and objects you have around the house to create a love mandala, to remind you of the pleasure of love.

To begin, play some soft background music. Light some candles or incense if that appeals to you. Take a few deep breaths and tune in to your intuition. Ask what to use to make your mandala. It could be paper clips, the petals of a flower, the socks in your laundry basket, q-tips or the segments of an orange.  Perhaps it’s some crayon stubs or scraps of paper, or some dried pinto or kidney beans. Don’t second-guess yourself. Simply allow your intuition and visual sense to guide you as you collect the materials to make your mandala.

Place the mandala parts of a tray and sit and ponder them as you tune into love and pleasure. Then let your hands create your mandala. Feel happy and loving as the mandala takes shape, and be thrilled by your own art and your inner happiness and love.  Let the experience of love and pleasure inside you come out. You may feel surprised. Relax and know that you are creating love and pleasure visually.

Mandalas are creations from the heart and soul and are meant to be seen and adored.  Tibetan monks create intricate mandalas from sand and then destroy them as soon as they are made. The purpose is as a symbol of devotion. Ask you intuition for guidance about what to do with your mandala ~ perhaps you want to share it with your loved ones, perhaps not. Trust what information comes to you and know that it all comes from love and pleasure.

After you have created your mandala, choose to look through the heart and eyes of love and pleasure as you go about your day. Choosing love and pleasure is an intentional act and you can choose it any time.

May this pearl of visual pleasure and love, and creating a mandala, remind you that you have the power and the gift of creating beauty, pleasure and love in any moment.

© 2014 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

End of Year Romantic and Intimate Planning

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Sexy after Cancer, Barbara Musser, cancer and intimacy, breast cancer and sexuality, pleasure plan, cancer and love, intimacy after cancer

This time of year is a wonderful time to review the year that is ending and envision for the coming year. While you may have done this before with goals you may not have done this in the areas of romance and intimacy. Ready for a new twist?

Plan an evening solo or with your sweetheart. Set the stage with some music you love, candles, a glass of wine or cider and some uninterrupted time. Grab a journal and a pen so you can make some notes.

Sit down, relax and take some deep breaths as you gently close your eyes. With your eyes closed, review the year that is ending, through the lens of intimacy and romance. What did you experience that felt intimate or romantic? Reflect back and remember specific events, experiences, words or feelings that come to mind when you think of intimacy and romance.

What happened that brought you pleasure? What would you like to experience more of or less of? What would make you feel more intimate or romantic? These memories can be small events, even a glance or a gesture, a moment of flirtation, a special embrace, all the way up to a weekend getaway just for you. Take your time as you reflect on the year. Make some notes in your journal as things come to mind. If you are doing this with your partner, tell each other what comes to mind for you and capture all the moments.

When you complete your review of the year, go through your notes and circle or underline the things that you want to continue in the new year. Start a new page in the journal for 2014 and title it “Romance and Intimacy 2014” or whatever title appeals to you.

Transfer the circled or underlined items to this new page. Then close your eyes and envision what would have the new year feel intimate and romantic to you. Get creative and ask your heart, mind and spirit for inspiration. Make notes as you get ideas and inspiration and talk with each other about what you want to create.

If you need some help, complete this sentence with each other: “ I feel loved when…” and do some brainstorming. Write down all the ideas without editing them. Once you have compiled a list, go back and circle the items that appeal most to you. You can sort items by giving them an “A”, “B” or “C” rating, with “A”  being those that have the highest appeal.

Take your notes for the New Year and make a Pleasure Plan. Take 1 or 2 “A” items and agree to do these at least once a week. You can also mix in the “B” and “C” items. It’s fine to repeat items as well. Or you can focus on 1 or 2 items a month. The idea is to create a plan that will work for you and ensure that you have many intimate and romantic times.

Something that works for many is to have a weekly date. Put it in your calendar and treat it as important as any other appointments you make. It’s important to put these dates in your calendars because life is so busy that it’s easy to let romance slip in the midst of too many other priorities. Many people make it at the same time every week so that they create the habit of a weekly date. My sweetheart and I have a weekly Tuesday night date, which we keep even if one of us is traveling ~ when that happens, we’re on the phone or Skype together doing something romantic. We are committed to our weekly dates.

Let us know what your Pleasure Plan is so that we can all learn and be inspired! And here’s to you and your pleasure.

© 2013 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

Cozy Sensual Solstice Ritual

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Sexy After Cancer, Barbara Musser, Sexy Solstice ritual, cancer and intimacy, breast cancer and sexuality

December 21 is the winter Solstice, the longest and darkest night of the year.  Here’s a way to turn the darkness into romance and stay warm and cuddly ~

Turn up the heat or light a fire if you have a fireplace, to make the room toasty. Warm some scented massage oil as well and gather some other supplies including a hand towel, some candles, sensual background music and incense if you like it, and have your slippers or a pair of warm socks nearby. Brew some tea or hot chocolate or make a hot toddy if you drink alcohol. Make a nest of pillows in front of the fire, or near a lighted candle. Put on the music, light the candles (I like to use lots of votive candles or tea lights), light the incense, and invite your sweetie into the nest. If you’re single, you can create this ritual just for you ~ after all, you are your life partner!

Begin by sitting close enough so that you can gaze into each other’s eyes. As you look into your sweetheart’s eyes, take some deep breaths to relax and connect with each other. Feel the connection of your eyes and your hearts as you continue to slow down your breathing. Lean forward and give him or her a kiss, tell them you love them and that you want to adore them with a hand and foot massage.

Begin with their hands. Put some of the warmed oil in your palms and rub your hands together to spread the oil around. Then take their hands in yours and simply hold their hands for a few moments. Then begin a gentle massage of their fingers, hands and wrists. Experiment with different pressures and types of stroking ~ try long strokes from wrist to fingertips, run your fingernails gently across their palms, gently pull on their fingers. Look into their eyes so that you can see their response and ask them what feels best to them. When you feel their hands and fingers relax fully, hold their hands in yours and then give them a gentle squeeze. Wipe off any excess oil with the hand towel. Gently kiss their hands and then place their hands on their lap.

Next, prepare to massage their feet. Remove their shoes and socks and oil your hands again. Then hold their feet in your hands. As with the hands, experiment with different pressure and stroking as you love their feet. Imagine that you are honoring and massaging the feet of a god or goddess, because you are. If you knew you were touching the feet of a god or goddess, how would you touch them? Massage, stroke and love their ankles, heels, soles, insteps, arches, balls of the feet, tops of the feet, toes and the spaces between the toes. Get creative and let their pleasure guide you.

When you are complete with the massage, wipe off any excess oil with the hand towel. Kiss their toes and feet and then put on clean socks or slippers.

If your sweetie is in the mood to return the favor, sit back, relax and receive their loving touch as they massage your hands and feet.

If you are giving yourself this gift of pleasure, massage one hand with the other, and then one foot at a time. Take your time and really love yourself up!

 

During these long winter nights, get creative with ways to love each other through your touch. Feel free to share with us so that we can be inspired by your pleasure!

© 2013 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.

For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

More Stories About Kissing Under the Mistletoe

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Barbara Musser, sexy after cancer, cancer and intimacy, cancer and kissing, cancer and the holidays, breast cancer

From the earliest times mistletoe has been one of the most magical, mysterious and sacred plants of European folklore. It was believed to bestow life and fertility; protect against poison; and be an aphrodisiac. The mistletoe of the sacred oak tree was used in ancient Celtic Druid rituals. On the sixth night of the moon, white-robed Druid priests would cut the oak mistletoe with a golden sickle. Two white bulls would be sacrificed amid prayers that the recipients of the mistletoe would prosper.

Mistletoe was long considered as both a sexual symbol and the “soul” of the oak tree. It was gathered at both summer and winter solstices, and this may be the beginning of the custom of using mistletoe to decorate homes at Christmas time.

The Greeks also thought mistletoe had mystical powers ~ in the Middle Ages and later, mistletoe was hung from ceilings to ward off evil spirits. In Europe, mistletoe branches were placed over house and stable doors to prevent the entrance of witches.

Kissing under the mistletoe is first associated with the Greek festival of Saturnalia and later with primitive marriage rites. In the eighteenth century, the English used the magical appeal of mistletoe in a kissing ball made of it. At Christmas time, a young lady standing under a ball of mistletoe and greens cannot refuse to be kissed. This kiss could mean deep romance of lasting friendship and good will.

Even though pagan significance may be forgotten, the custom of exchanging a kiss under the mistletoe is still practiced in many European countries as well as Canada and the United States. If a couple in love exchanges a kiss under the mistletoe, it is interpreted as a promise to marry as well as a prediction for happiness.

This is one myth about this time of year that is worth perpetuating, especially with all the commercialism of the season. Try making a kissing ball with some mistletoe, greens and ribbons, and hang it in a prominent place in your house. Let people know the ritual when they come into your home ~ that whoever stands under the mistletoe will be kissed and wished friendship, good will and love, along with all the blessings of the season. No matter what your spiritual beliefs are, this ritual can be a magical symbol of love and kindness. Wishing you and your loved ones all the blessings and miracles of this end of year season!

© 2013 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

A Story About Kissing Under the Mistletoe

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Barbara Musser, sexy after cancer, cancer and kissing, holiday romance, the myth of kissing under mistltoe

Mistletoe has long been considered an aphrodisiac and holiday symbol of love. Where does this tradition come from? There are Greek, Celtic and Norse legends about it, all related to love and fertility.  After you read about them you may want to find some mistletoe and hang it in your home during the holiday season. After all, we can’t have too many kisses, can we? Let’s use mistletoe to spice things up a bit!

In the Norse myth, Frigga is the goddess of love, sexuality and wisdom. Frigga was the mother of Balder, the god of the summer sun. Balder had a dream about death, which greatly alarmed Frigga, for if the summer sun died, all life on earth would end. In an attempt to prevent this, Frigga went at once to air, fire, water, earth and every animal and plant seeking a promise that no harm would come to her son. Balder now couldn’t be hurt by anything on or under the earth. But Balder had one enemy ~ Loki, god of evil ~ and Loki knew of one plant Frigga had overlooked in her quest to keep Balder safe. It grew neither on nor under the earth, but on apple and oak trees. It was mistletoe. Loki made an arrow tip of the mistletoe, gave it to the blind god of winter, Hoder, who shot it, killing Balder. The sky paled and all things in earth and heaven wept for the sun god. For 3 days each element tried to bring Balder back to life. Frigga, the goddess and his mother finally restored him. The legend says that the tears she shed for her son turned into the pearly white berries on the mistletoe plant and in her joy, Frigga kissed everyone who passed beneath the tree on which it grew. The legend ends with a decree that whoever stands under the mistletoe, no harm should befall them, only a kiss as a token of love.

It’s easy to see how this could result in mistletoe as an emblem of love. And since Christmas has pre-Christian roots, this lovely myth may have sourced a beloved ritual.

If you choose to hang some mistletoe in your home, what will is symbolize for you? Love? Kissing? Safety from harm? The warmth of the season?

What does kissing mean to you? Do you like it? Want more of it? Want to be kissed? Take some time to ponder what kissing is to you and if you want it, how you can create more kissing in your life. As I was writing this, I was inspired to send a text message to my honey to invite him on a kissing date tonight. He said yes! Lucky me and lucky him ~ kissing is one of my favorite ways to connect and express love.

Next time, some more stories about mistletoe and kissing.

© 2013 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

Integration

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Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer, Integrating Body and Heart after breast cancer, breast cancer and sexuality

In the exploration of what intimacy and sexuality mean now in your life on the cancer journey, it’s worth taking a look at what integration can be. With all the other impacts of breast cancer, your experience of intimacy and sexuality may be very different now. Perhaps not; however, 80-90% of women experience “difficulties” in these areas. In my research and work with many women with breast cancer, intimacy and sexuality can be tender topics. Lots of women report that their sex life wasn’t so great prior to their diagnosis and treatment, and it hardly seems worth the effort it would take to rev it back up again.

Hearing things like this makes me feel sad. Our sexual energy is our life force energy and thus is a very vital part of who we are. Our life force energy flows in many ways and there are lots of ways to integrate it. A useful approach is to first expand your definitions of intimacy and sexuality, to include more of you than your genitals, insertion and fluid exchange. There are many posts about this in previous Sexy Saturdays, so feel free to find lots of ideas and suggestions.

Here is a gentle practice designed to help you with the integration of your thoughts, your heart and your sexuality. Read through it, then guide yourself through it in whatever way feels right to you.

Arrange time and freedom from distractions so that you can fully relax and go deeply into this practice. You can do this in your bedroom or another place where you can comfortably lie down and relax. Have some flowers, candles, incense if you like it and soft background music. You can do this practice with our without wearing clothing, whichever is more comfortable to you. Make this a sacred time for you to honor and integrate your heart, mind and body for a deeper and more satisfying experience of your intimacy and sexuality.

Lie down on your back and take several full deep breaths to allow your body to relax and to draw you awareness inward. As you breathe, extend the length of each inhalation, then suspend the breath for a few moments, neither breathing in nor out. Then slowly exhale, allowing your lungs to empty. Suspend the breath for a few moments, neither breathing in nor out. With each breath, inhale relaxation, love and integration, and exhale any thoughts that distract you. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth.

Continue breathing and gently place one hand on your forehead and the other on your heart. Feel the warmth and weight of your hands and continue to breathe. Gently repeat these words, speaking out loud ~

  • May my thoughts about intimacy and sexuality be informed by my heart
  • May my thoughts about intimacy and sexuality be held with love in my heart

Repeat this phrase several times, and then move the hand on your heart so that it covers your genitals. Feel the warmth and weight of your hands and continue to breathe. Gently repeat these words, speaking out loud ~

  • May my thoughts about intimacy and sexuality always honor my sexual organs
  • May my intimate and sexual activities be infused with wisdom and truth

Continue breathing and move the hand on your forehead so that it covers your heart. Feel the warmth and weight of your hands and continue to breathe. Gently repeat these words out loud ~

  • May I always feel the connection of my heart and my love in my intimate and sexual times
  • May my intimacy and love making be infused with love

Continue breathing and repeating the words for as long as you wish. You may be inspired to speak other words as well. Trust your heart, wisdom and body to guide you about what will help you to integrate more fully.

When you feel complete, place your hands where they feel best, and take a few final deep breaths. This practice will gently help you to integrate your body, mind, heart and spirit to your personal truths about intimacy and sexuality.

As you experience this practice, we’d love to know about any visions, awareness or wisdom that you receive. Feel free to share this or any other experiences so that we can all benefit from your wisdom and experience.

© 2012 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

If it’s Not One Thing, it’s Your Mother

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Last night I participated in a supervised therapy group to learn about Process Therapy. This is a type of therapy where we follow what comes up in a conversation as a key operating principle and see where it leads. After a brief description of Process Therapy, it was practice time: one person was the therapist and another was the client, and the rest of the group observed, coached and gave feedback.

I was chosen to be the client, which was powerful, given that lots of grief has risen to the surface since my mother died several weeks ago. What’s been surprising to me is the intensity of this grief, because I thought that after decades of working on my relationship with my mother, I was at peace about this. Until she died!

As I sat in the midst of the group last night and talked about my grief, I realized that I was feeling deep sadness and shame. We explored the shame and its aspects ~ shame about not being healed in this relationship; shame about how I love and don’t love well; shame about my emotional volatility, and shame about being a woman and sexual being.

What?!? Shame about being a woman? Shame about being a sexual being? Wait, I teach this stuff, how could this be? I was dumbfounded, confused and so sad about this. As we worked, I could hear my mother’s voice saying things like,

  • “Good girls don’t touch themselves down there”
  • “Shame on you for showing you panties”
  • “You are driven by sex”
  • “No man will ever want you because of the things you’ve done”
  • “You don’t need to go to college because you’re only going to get married and have babies”
  • and so on…

This felt like the foundation of my experience of being a woman, and it was all based on shaming messages that I had long since internalized. These ideas form the root stock of long ago knowing I was damaged goods. I thought I had worked through and healed these wounds.

Apparently not… as we continued to work, we created a positive and loving mother. I heard the messages she said, including

  • “You are beautiful inside and out”
  • “Your sexuality is your life force energy and is a beautiful gift”
  • “Giving yourself pleasure is a sacred gift and helps you to teach your lovers how to love you better”
  • “Talking about sex is healing and fun”
  • and so on…

We were literally re-wiring my neurons and beliefs. AS we did this work, I realized that one of the greatest gifts my mother gave me is the opportunity to do the work of healing these wounds and helping other women to find their way to deeper self-love and acceptance.

Here’s a practice for you to do some deeper healing ~

Take some private quiet time for yourself. Make a cup of tea if you like, sit in a comfy chair and have your journal nearby. Get comfortable and quiet and take some deep breaths as you gently close your eyes. Use your breath to help you relax further and draw your awareness inward.

Ask for the messages you received early on about yourself as a woman and a sexual being, to arise in your consciousness. Listen to them and ask for them all to be revealed to you. When you have received them, take a few moments to open your eyes and write them in your journal. More may come to you as you write.

Close your eyes again and ask your Inner Aphrodite or another loving voice to tell you the truth of who you are as a woman and as a sexual being. Listen to this truth as it is revealed to you. When the words stop, take a few moments to open your eyes and write them in your journal. More may come to you as you write.

Now review what you have written. This is a time for you to consciously choose what you know to be the truth about who you are, and to choose to believe the truth. Here’s a hint ~ if it’s the negative voice that you think is the truth, you are listening to the wrong voice! It may take some practice and repetition for this to begin to shift for you. However, if you stick with it and repeat the truth daily for a few weeks,  you will notice that your beliefs begin to change, and that you begin to know that you are a beautiful woman and sexual being.

Please share the truth of who you are so that we can all learn from you!

© 2012 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

You are Your Inner Aphrodite

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Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer, breast cancer and beauty, meet your Inner Aphrodite

Now that you’ve met your Inner Aphrodite and set up a sacred space to honor her, let’s explore some ways you can nourish her growth and expression in you. Here are some questions to ponder and open some possibilities ~

  • What does Aphrodite represent to you?
  • If you knew you were a goddess, how would you treat yourself?
  • How does Aphrodite dress and adorn herself?
  • How does Aphrodite want to be honored?
  • What will it take for you to know that you are beautiful and desirable?

With these questions in mind, take some time for yourself to sit in a quiet place. Have your journal nearby and prepare yourself to take a little journey into your natural wisdom. Put on some sensual music, light a candle, sit comfortably (preferably in or near the sacred space you have created), and gently close your eyes. Take some deep breaths all the way into your belly, hips and pelvis, and let each exhalation help you to relax and draw you awareness inward.

Now imagine your Inner Aphrodite there with you. Notice how she stands or sits; what she’s wearing; the scent of her and how she breathes, moves and inhabits her body. Ask her what she has to teach you or offer you ~ what she wants you to know about your connection with her and why she is here in and with you.

Notice what comes to you as you sit with Aphrodite. What do you sense, see or know? As you open to receive whatever is here for you, know that what you get is perfect for you. Trust that more will come at just the right time, in just the right ways.

This time of year around Halloween, the new moon, The Day of the Dead and Samhain, is thought to be an auspicious time. In many traditions the teaching is that this is the time when the veils between this material world and the spiritual world is thin. That means that we can more easily access the unseen, unknown and mysterious aspects of life.

In whatever way intuitively feels right to you, open to be nourished in the ways that matter most to your spirit. Drink deeply from the well of feminine wisdom and mystery, knowing that as you invite it, it comes to you.

Sit, breathe and receive for as long as feels right to you. When this transmission from Aphrodite to you feels complete, express your gratitude to her ~ perhaps saying thank you, or bowing at her feet, or feeling the love and thankfulness in your heart as you look into her eyes. Take another deep breath and open  your eyes when you are ready to do so.

Make some notes in your journal so that you can remember this time. Let what you received bathe you in feminine nourishment. When you go to sleep tonight, ask for any additional messages or dreams to come to you.

Feel free to share what you receive so that the Inner Aphrodites can connect and honor one another.

 

© 2012 by Barbara Musser, Sexy After Cancer.
For more resources, go to SexyAfterCancer.com

This blog does not reflect the opinions of The Pink Fund, its Founder, Board of Directors, Advisers or Volunteers. It is not meant to serve as medical advice of any kind. Any questions about your health and sexuality should be directed to a licensed physician or therapist. Any opinions expressed are solely those of the writer who voluntarily blogs for The Pink Fund without compensation.

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